27/01/2014

THE DESERTER



Life is a war.
My mind is the battlefield.
But I deserted a long time ago.
I could not take it any more.
All the afflictions.
All the harms.
I bear too many scars.
Within me fear and hatred are intermingled.
In my heart I hemorrhage uncontrollably.
My soul is torn.
I try to run from it all.
But it all comes with me.
I am diseased beyond any healing.
It is consuming my mind.
Fragmented as it is.
I cannot continue to run any more.
I drop down.
Exhausted and exasperated.
Any hope slips from my grasp.
I am broken.
Poison racks my entire body.
Everything is growing grey.
Ever darkening.
As my heartbeat slows.
I can still hear the screams within my mind.
The visions haunt me.
I struggle to stand.
But I've no strength left at all.
And so I fall.
There is no getting back up this time.
As I continue to bleed where I lie.
I roll over and stare up at the heavens above.
"God, please heal or take me."
I am so far away from what I can take.
I am so far away from myself.
"God, if You are going to do anything please do it now."
With a fractured sight I look for You, I look to You.
There is no going back for me.
I will not go back!
The trauma is just too much for this crumbling man.
Call me a coward if you want.
I do not care.
This is the end for me.

SCOTT DAVID BUCKLEY

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I'd love to know what you think of this poem.