EPISODE I: IT'S NOT OKAY TO BE NOT OKAY, EVER! /EPISODE II: YOU CAN NEVER GO BACK TO OKAY

It's never alright.
It's never okay.
So DO NOT tell me it is!
Do not give me hope when you have none.
I will not be lied to.
As you always have.
You have turned my life into nothing but lies.
Go on, leave!
I do not need you here.
I do not need you, period!
I am tired of everyone being careful around me.
It's not like I am going to break down if you do not.
I can see right through it all.
And I would rather be alone than to have to live with that.
You might as well slap me across my fucking face.
I know you just do not know.
I know you just do not understand.
I DO NOT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU!!!
That's your problem not mine.
Leave me alone.
You do not know me.
So I do not know you.
Deep down I do not feel I want to.
No, I'm not okay!
And I am not okay with that!

SCOTT DAVID BUCKLEY

(THEY SAY) LOVE IS BLIND

They say love is blind.
Who are they, but the blind ones.
How can they say?
When they know not of what they speak.
A corrupt heart is a dead heart.
How can the dead speak?
Love is alive.
Love is for the living.
The seekers and the finders.
The finders are the keepers.
It is on them that love shines so bright.
Their hearts expand.
Giving breath to love.
As love breathes, love spreads,
    love consumes.
Love is not blind.
Nor does it blind.
Love is sight where there was none.

SCOTT DAVID BUCKLEY

FATHER AND SON

You were there waiting for me when-- 

   I made my entrance into this world.

You gave me two names for this life.

I was given to you, you were given--

    to me.

We would be father and son.

You watched over me as I grew.

You did your best to teach me-- 

   what was right and true.

You showed me the way to go.

You gave me your love.

I gave you mine.

Although never spoken.

We each knew in our hearts.

You watched me as I stood on--

   my own.

You watched me as I began--

   to think for myself.

You laughed as I would not listen--

   to anyone.

I had become a man, my own man.

I saw the pride in your eyes.

As wide grew your smile.

I knew your love for me would--

   be with me forever.

Then silently you left me and went--

   home.

You fell asleep and awoke in eternity,

Although I miss you here.

I celebrate your life and it's--

   continuance in glory.

Beneath the pain there is joy.

For I know we will be together again.

I thank God for you.

Till we see each other again...

SCOTT DAVID BUCKLEY

My Mental Illness & Christian Faith: Oops, I forgot to take my medication

My Mental Illness & Christian Faith: Oops, I forgot to take my medication: Why do people with mental illness stop taking their prescribed medication? We see this often in individuals with Bipolar Disorder and...

THE WAR WITHIN ME

Take me away.
Far away from myself.
I'm so tired of all the fighting.
I am bogged down in blood and mire.
I am all ragged and ravaged.
Ripped apart and torn.
Save me from myself.
My own worst enemy.
We've been fighting for way too long.
And I have grown weary, oh so weary.
I just want to lay down my arms.
I want to surrender.
I don't want to retreat because I will have to fight another day.
It's time to give up.
Stop all this insanity.
I don't want to fight with myself any more.
Let my white flag fly.
May we come to terms.
Walk away in peace.
Let the healing begin.
Let a new life begin.

SCOTT DAVID BUCKLEY