FALLEN

I am just a fallen soul.
I walk a crooked and broken path 
  in pitch black alone.
I have have known terror, I have known true horror.
I have been angry, I have been enraged,
  I have blamed and hated.
I have turned my back and walked away
  from all I knew to be true.
I never did know why I did it.
I have gone my own way just to become lost.
I have lost hope, I have given up on faith.
Love has been so foreign.
I was so desperate.
I reached out and light shone down on me.
I was taken up, out and away from all this misery.
I am learning to love again, 
  I am learning to trust again.
Once more I have hope and faith.
I will not let go, not ever again, 'cause then
  I'd be truly lost, empty and alone.
I couldn't take that again, I'm just not strong enough.
I have come to realize I cannot make it through
  this night alone.
Heaven's star shine your light down on this
  poor excuse for a man, guide me home.
I am so weary, I just want to rest.
Please provide shelter and refuge for this broken 
  down wanderer.
I will wait on You.
Will You give me wings to soar?
I just want to be closer, closer to You.
Please draw close and hold my heart, 
  shattered as it is.
It's all I have.
Please repair my torn soul.
Will You take me, make me whole?
I just want to rest in You.
Wrap me up and keep me safe and warm.
I have never known what it is to be loved.
And if I wander away, will You come after me?
Will You search me down?
Will You leave the ninety-nine just to find
  and bring home this one?
I am still prone to wander, disillusioned 
  with to much wonder.
What is out there for me?
Will I ever find what it is I'm looking for?
Will I ever ever know just what is I am looking for?
Fallen again.
Face down and marred.
Naked, shivering and afraid.
I just don't know.
I still have hope, I still have faith, they're
  all I have left.
I can feel Your touch upon me.
Once again You pick me up, out, and carry me away 
  from here.
Out of the dark and despair.
I rest my head on Your strong shoulder.
This is where I belong, I belong with and to You.
Please don't ever let me go, don't ever let me down.
I have known this all too well in my so-called life.
I can't promise I will never hurt or disappoint You,
  it's what I do.
Forsaken by one and all except You.
No matter what, I know You will move 
  all Heaven and Earth just to reach me.
But I am my own worst enemy, I have this habit
  of lying to myself, and so it always 
sends me running.
I just want to die. 
I am the guilty one.
But there You are once again, with arms open wide,
  You take me in again, I am home where I belong.
Nothing else matters any more, I am here, 
  here I will stay.
No more fear, no more shivering, no more 
  tears shed.
Learning to love again, I can love again.
But my old man still haunt me, still calls to me,
  whispering in my ear, enticing me to follow.
But I will stand firm this time, I will hold fast
  this time.
This is my home, you can just go back to Hell
  from whence you came.
You cannot have me.
Not now, not ever, forever more.
SCOTT DAVID BUCKLEY-(30/09/2012)